A Naval Servicemember Speaks Out on DADT
Editor's Note: In recognition of Military Appreciation Month and Memorial Day, ignite Magazine proudly recognizes a true Leading Lady – in her own words. It has been five months since the repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" (DADT), and this reflection speaks volumes to the impact of the repeal on veteran servicemembers everywhere. Thank you, Adrienne, for using your real name and for being a true Leading Lady!
Following the success of the African-American Civil Rights Movement and the Women's Liberation Movement, the Gay Rights Movement has been prospering over the last four decades, albeit slowly. Fortunately for the gay men and women of the armed forces, repealing the DADT policy has been a major platform in which the gay voice can be heard.
I personally have spent ten years on active duty, five of which have been overseas. I have been on countless deployments, received gun qualifications, and awards and letters of commendation. I've worn Kevlar in combat zones, spent sleepless nights aboard a USS Destroyer in the middle of the ocean, and celebrated Christmas in a tent with a rationed MRE meal. I am also gay. There are gay soldiers, sailors and airmen that have gone through just that and more. There are gay soldiers, sailors and airmen that have given their lives to protect the freedoms of this great country.
Yet, despite all of the sacrifices that we make daily, we have continually been denied fair and equal treatment solely based on the fact that instead of going home to husbands and wives, we go home to our "roommates." And even though we work just as hard, if not harder, to be recognized as a crucial part of the team, we have essentially remained invisible. Whenever a straight friend asks me what it's like to be gay in the military I always tell them to imagine that they work for a company that every day they have to go into work and pretend to be gay. The irony of the situation is that I am proud of who I am and I am equally proud to be part of something that makes a difference -- and yet my two worlds could never be intertwined. It's enraging to think that I would have risked losing everything if I had chosen to include the woman that I have committed to sharing the rest of my life with in my military-related avocations and accomplishments. Or that I would have had to leave her behind if duty called.
So I, along with the rest of the gay military members, bore the burden of creating a workplace persona that has inevitably become a lie. I have expended more energy than I would like to admit fabricating reasons as to why I show up stag to family days or military balls and why no one comes to support me at award and promotion ceremonies. Fighting to repeal DADT was our way of telling the nation that we have had enough; that this is where we have drawn the line! No longer will we be forced to live in the shadows of our sexuality. No longer will we stand by and allow for our feelings not to be taken into consideration. The discussion of allowing gays to serve openly in the military comes up quite often "in the ranks," but the only prosaic reasoning behind being on the opposition that I hear mentioned is that people are uncomfortable with how it will affect them; being forced to work alongside us. Why should we be forced to persuade our heterosexual counterparts that we deserve the opportunity to serve right alongside them? We are tax-paying, law abiding, American born citizens and have every right to grab a gun and stand post, go aboard a ship and protect our borders, interpret intelligence or pilot a fighter jet that they do!
What these same people fail to realize is that active duty gay men and women already exist among them. Nothing is going to change! Everyone is so concerned about creating training in order to integrate gays into the military that no one has stopped long enough and looked around to see that we're already integrated.
What will change, however, is that our fear will now be eradicated. We won't have to sit back idly and hold our tongues when someone wants to say something derogatory about gays in fear of being type casted. We won't have to fear that we will run into a supervisor or a colleague downtown while walking hand in hand with our partner. We won't have to fear that someone will find out what goes on in our personal life and have it put an end to our careers. We won't have to fear that we aren't getting to enjoy at least one of the basic rights that we risk our lives to protect. We serve this nation proudly and by repealing DADT, the nation has finally thanked us.
|
|
Tweet |
|